But it can sometimes prove difficult. They have no private life," said Lucas, who worked as an escort in Europe in his early 20s. Other than in a handful of rural counties in Nevada, selling sex for money is illegal in the United States. The escorts who spoke to HuffPost all said they had never been targeted by law enforcement and that arrests among rent boys seem to be rare. However, most also seemed aware of the risks involved. Some escorts said that leaving the industry or the prospect of doing so and finding other employment can be daunting for this same reason.
In , adult entertainment lawyer Michael Fattorosi told Salon. The fears of social alienation and judgment also weigh heavily on the minds of some in the industry. Leo Forte, who served in the military before getting into porn and escorting, said he waffled for years before deciding to pursue sex work. Several escorts said the lifestyle has strained relationships with family members, and many expressed that dating can be extremely difficult. Despite the drawbacks that come with the job, many escorts maintain the sacrifices have been well worth it.
You have to be almost like a healer -- sexually. The struggle to overcome common misconceptions about working in the business is a different hurdle altogether, however. Yet, the stereotype lingers. He said few show signs of mental illness or depression. Additionally, some escorts may need help with money management or body image issues, while others need support figuring out an exit plan. Grov and other experts say that to protect the lives and rights of escorts and other sex workers, there needs to be more discussions about the industry -- both in the community and outside it.
Murder is obviously bad, but the exchange of sex for money? That's a little blurrier, at least to me. For now, change seems to be slow-moving: Sex work remains stigmatized, and decriminalization is a long way off. But some escorts and former escorts are taking matters into their own hands by challenging the stereotypes that dog the industry and fighting to create safe spaces for escorts to find the resources and support they may need.
Former escort Hawk Kinkaid has long been leading this grassroots effort with his website, Hook Online. Founded by Kinkaid in and run completely by volunteers, Hook Online is a platform where male escorts can share their stories and find resources and information that are useful in their line of work. Visitors can read blog posts about safe sex and filing taxes, as well as guides to marketing and dealing with police. For them, we hope [the site] will help lessen that learning curve, help them make fewer mistakes. Some in the industry say Hook Online has been an invaluable tool for escorts, as the site has both disseminated crucial information and fostered a sense of community.
Escort Eli Lewis says he hopes other safe spaces -- both online and off -- will emerge in the coming years to promote even greater unity and change. For now, Lewis, whose day job is social media director at Rentboy. He regularly offers advice to others in the industry and talks to people who have questions about his life as a rent boy.
But if a conversation starts, he said, perhaps perceptions will start to change. Tap here to turn on desktop notifications to get the news sent straight to you.
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